Welcome to the party. To that lovely chaotic cavalcade of life within the circle of academia. The movement is starting to pick up speed now. Four months! The pendulum swings and in that time I had best discover a future.
Grad schools loom large and mystifying in the distance. The guardians of the path stand before me: a test of worth and a test of trial. The GRE and my submissions must be completed while, at the same time, I must not falter in my current explorations in my general classes. I have an honors thesis to write: an exploration of self in a technical world. So too, I have my Poetry Seminar, which is quite possibly the most electrifying and terrifying class I have ever taken. All of this in addition to my obligations to outside projects that I am all but absolute in my dedication to.
What do you do when you have found what you want? How do you make sure you never lose it? I am working on projects I love, volunteering with organizations whose missions I support wholeheartedly, and finding myself on the track I always wanted to travel. I’m also terrified that something or someone will come along and tear it all away from me. That in one fell swoop all of this will disappear and I will find myself back in a cubicle working as a nameless drone for some tiresome corporation.
I know these concerns are primarily baseless but they remain. I am a refugee still looking for a place and I hope that, by the time this year is over, I will have found one.
